Boundaries.
We all have them.
We know ourselves. We know what we want in our lives. We know what we do not like. We know what we can handle. We know what we cannot handle. All of that creates personal boundaries.
And yet- even though we know our limits, we can sometimes not keep to them, and in turn we get hurt. We allowed ourselves to go to a place we did not want to go. Maybe something is bothering you, but you cannot describe it because you do not know how to articulate your boundary or you do not even understand that there is an absolute limit for you in a particular arena of your life.
If you have not formulated some boundaries in your life, the first step is, to be honest with yourself. How do you REALLY want to be treated in your life? What kind of friends do you REALLY want to be around and how do you want to interact with them? Those are three of many important questions to ask yourself to formulate your boundaries.
Once you have boundaries- STICK TO THEM (RULE 119)!
Understanding my boundaries is something that I have lacked a lot until I went to counseling. There was a lot in my life that bothered me, but I did not know why it bothered me. It just did. I also kept allowing the behavior to happen even though I knew that is not how I wanted to be treated, because I did not have boundaries, and even if I did have limits, my follow-through was weak.
NO.
It is okay to say NO (RULE 120).
In fact-
Say no.
You are allowed to say no. If you told that to me one year ago- I may have contended that idea. Now. Heck no. YOU CAN SAY NO.
Here is the power of being able to say no. By you saying no, then you are aware of yourself and your limits. You stay in control of a situation. But if you say yes, even though deep in yourself you know you should have said no, you lose control, and what happens after can be hurtful. I am not saying you can not get hurt if you say no, but you can definitely limit your chances of getting hurt by controlling your situation and knowing your limits.
When you can say no, you can make changes in your life to create a life and mental state that is filled with confidence, self-love, and happiness.
What are some changes that you need to make? What are your boundaries? Are you honestly sticking to your limits?
No is a powerful word- use it to help yourself.